Letting GO

It has been eighteen years since my oldest was born. I loved Him before I even knew he was being formed inside of me. He was a part of me and I would do anything to protect him. He was my son and I would do anything to provide for him.  And I think I caught a glimpse of what God must have felt when He created man.

While I carried him inside of me I would walk by an old delivery truck on my way to college every morning. The exhaust was so terrible I remember holding my breath to keep it from hurting him and his immature lungs. After he was born I walked by that same truck as I pushed him tucked securely in his stroller. And I held my breath. In that moment I knew that I could no longer protect him in the same way I had for nine months. He was in the world now and the things of this world would try to come against my provisions for him. I would do my best to keep him safe, comforted, and protected. I would do my best to love him unconditionally, teach him truth, and provide him with the things he needed. But I knew one day he would make his own choices. I couldn’t protect him forever. I couldn’t choose for him forever. I had to let go and choose to trust in God’s provisions for him.

Through the teenage years this was tough. As a parent you really want to protect your child from making any mistakes. You want to protect your child from getting hurt or experiencing any pain at all. And I think I caught a glimpse of what God felt when Eve chose to eat the fruit.

You can give your children everything that is good, right and true and they still will choose to believe the lies of the enemy. They will still need to find out for themselves if what they were told is truly good, right and true. We don’t want that for them because we know that if they chase anything but their creator they will be right where Eve was and right where you and I have been. But that is the amazing thing about grace and about who God is. Even after Eve ate the fruit God did not stop the conversation with her. When we look to other things to fulfill us He still chases us. He still chooses to come after us with His unrelenting, steadfast love.

So chase your teen. By that I mean, love them and teach them about the garden and how you too were there. Don’t give up trying to have conversations. Tell them the reason you want to hold tightly is that you are afraid to let go because you know that they will want to chase after things. And chasing anything but bringing glory to God is a dead end. Teach them that there are consequences to disobedience. But most importantly show them the cross and how much they are loved. Model for them that they don’t have to hide like Eve did. They don’t have to pretend. They can come to you just as they are and you will have ring and robe in hand. And then let them choose. Because that is what a loving parent would do.


“While the son was still a long way off, his father saw him. He was filled with tender love for his son. He ran to him. He threw his arms around him and kissed him. “The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer fit to be called your son.’

 “But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattest calf and kill it. Let’s have a big dinner and celebrate. This son of mine was dead. And now he is alive again. He was lost. And now he is found.’ “So they began to celebrate.” Luke 15:20-24