The Price of Forgiveness

The other day I was brought back to a place that I should have known as shelter and instead I knew as pain. I entered full of a joy, not of my own, but soon felt it fade as I began to look around me. I started to think of the heartache that I felt the last time I had been there. I thought I had forgiven, but now I was face to face with the very instrument that had caused me to hurt deep into my soul. I wanted desperately to forgive and to harbor no bitterness or rage in my heart, but there I was standing at its feet. I was torn as to which way to look. Do I look to keep rehashing the pain or do I choose to be done? As I looked on I pictured the cross and thought, “Oh man, forgiveness sucks!”

I started to think about the cost. About the length that the Creator of the universe went to forgive me. I almost laughed in spite of myself as I thought about how I have wanted to hate people in the past because they have brought me pain. I started to realize how quick I am to become angry or “hate” someone over even just one false statement or accusation. And let’s just assume for a minute I am perfect. Let’s just assume I have never done any of these wrong things myself to anyone. Let’s just assume the only thing I have ever done is love with a pure, unconditional, steadfast love. Would I give my life for the people who hurt me? Would I leave my perfect home where I am praised every minute of every day to go and be mocked and tortured and beaten and die for all the people who have wronged me? There are days I wonder if I would even do that for my best friends and family members; the ones who treat me with love and respect. Oh yeah, forgiveness sucks!

At least it does when I look at what has been done to me. But isn’t it crazy when I look at what has been done for me? I have been forgiven. The One and Only, Holy God, and Creator of the universe, freely chose to leave His perfect home and give His life for me. To rescue me. To redeem me. To forgive me. He chose me. And let’s just be honest I am not perfect. I have done to Him and others the very same wrongs that have been done to me. I have not loved Him or others with a pure, unconditional, steadfast love. I didn’t receive forgiveness because I deserve it. So why should I choose to forgive only if someone deserves it? I choose to forgive because He forgave me. Forgiveness requires me to die to serve. I chose to die to myself to serve the One and Only God who gave His life for me. To save me. To free me. To forgive me.

He chose to forgive me so I could have life. A life free to love and to live in relationship with Him and others.The price of forgiveness has already been paid.

Not just for me.

“For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Matthew 6:14-15